It’s a Dog’s Life by Prima Donna Williams

Woof, wuff, woof! That’s dog-speak for “Ho, ho, ho.” So how y’all been doing? Mama T  (she hates it when I call her that. She said, “I ain’t birth’n no babies and I sure as hell ain’t birth no dog!—she can be so ghetto sometimes, but I digress) said I could send a shout out to my homies, so shout out, homies! (I hope she doesn’t edit me.)

Mama T and I have been at war for Queen B status since I got here. Some days I let her win. After all, she controls my food and I love me some food. But most of the time I win, like in this picture. She tried to put that stupid Santa hat on my head and I was like, “Uhn uhn, my name is Prima Donna, not Bama Donna.” So I tore it off my head and ripped it up with my mouth. If she wants somebody to wear a damn Santa hat in this house, let her ‘cause I ain’t the one.

So, when I’mma meet somebody from the St. Louis area? I’m beginning to think she
just made y’all up and scattered those pictures that come with the frame all
around the house claiming they family. Umm hmm, I got some imaginary friends too.

Anywho…life is grand. I got it good, better than some humans, and I’m looking forward to
growing old with Mama T. Holla back, y’all.

P.D. Williams